The Nest

knocking things out with a one two punch

Posted Saturday, April 05, 2008 7:31 PM

My wedding dress muslin is FINISHED!! 

I knew it wouldn't take me that long, but I'm glad its done as Mom is coming out next weekend.  Since I have yet to purchase a zipper (at all... most important those are...) I tried it on as best as I could (sans corset, because that's NOT finished yet) and I think it fits pretty well already!

Woo hoo!!!

Now, my next big worry is how the dress and corset are going to fit together.  Can't see until I try them both on... which means I'll be hammering grommets in front of the tv tonight. 

The dress... its simple, but even with one layer (just draping crepe) its heavy... with three?  Well, its gonna be a lot of dress without a scrap of tulle in sight. 

I'm not sure I'd have it any other way.
  

feelin' kinda down

Posted Friday, April 04, 2008 12:58 PM

Maybe its the gray skies outside...

So, I have another blog... a myspace blog.  Its really the best way for me to keep in touch with all of my far flung family and friends.  A lot of people tell me they love to read those blogs because they know what's going on and I make them laugh.

I started blogging over here because I'm really not sure how much those not engaged, already married (some divorced) people can take of wedding planning nonsense.  (well, it isn't nonsense to me!)

At any rate, both members of my BP are myspace friends... and E posted an announcement that she got a job offer and would probably be moving out to CA.  This is great for her.  I'm happy for her!!  Especially if this is what she wants to do. (She's going to be doing political activist/grass roots stuff). 

However, she comments me and tells me that this may change her plans for October, but she'll keep me updated and let me know before the last minute.  She even got sort of condescending and told me not to stress and that everything would work out.

Now, if you ask me, we're past the last minute here for picking bridesmaids.

(After reading alloyd14.googlepages.com I realize that there is still plenty of time for groomsmen.) 

I asked her to be my bride's maid a year and a half ago.  It shouldn't be just plans anymore, like she's just coming for a visit.

And so, I'm left wondering what she considers the last minute... a month, two?  Three weeks?

I've been talking to my mom about it, and she's saying that my little brother (the MOH) just doesn't get that he can't tell me what to do... that its OUR wedding, and he's welcome to suggest, but we don't have to do what he thinks.  He's even gone so far as to accuse us of trying to show off because of the cost of the catering.  (Which is actually reasonably inexpensive for NYC.)

My mom says she's going to have a heart to heart lunch with E (out of the presence of my brother) because she thinks E is getting my brother's cynicism in with things, and not getting the true story.  That her information is tainted. (Mom's words, not mine.)  At this point though, I'm starting to feel bad about asking either one of them.  I want to tell both of them to take a hike, because its scary enough without them being so.... I don't know... cynical.

And then there's my mom, who's trying to keep my feet on the ground about this and tell me "its just a party."

It sure doesn't feel like "just a party" to me, let me tell ya.
 

190 days to go

Posted Wednesday, April 02, 2008 12:58 PM

And we've finally put a deposit down on the caterer.  It sure took us a VERY long time.

Its also a little bit daunting (and depressing) to put numbers in to our budgeter.  I'm almost willing to quit doing that because we have a spread sheet at home.  Between the two of us, we're keeping pretty decent track of the money.

I don't like using the budgeter because it doesn't give us reasonable amounts of money for the space and the caterer.  If we were someplace outside of a major metropolitan area, it might be closer to the mark, but its WAAAYYYY off.

On a more positive note, we've put the deposit down on our DJ.  I was getting stressed out about it (because I contacted them almost as long ago as we started looking for caterers) worried that we'd lose our date.  The Fi was having a difficult time getting his DJ company to get back to him.  In the end, they came in at twice as much as my pick.

I feel kinda bad.  The Fi has been doing his own recon for things, and when we have stuff to compare we choose.  Unfortunately, because he's in the business (on the high end side) he tends to find companies that charge more than we can afford.

I just have to keep telling myself that we're making progress... things are getting done.  We have an appointment with the caterer and the space so our caterer can see our space (good good).

190 days to go.  A little over six months.

Don't Panic.

registry complete

Posted Monday, March 31, 2008 10:28 AM

Sorta.  We started a Macy's registry online MONTHS ago, but hadn't really done anything about it.  Saturday, we were out and about and decided that we'd go the Crate and Barrel route.  I could only handle about half an hour in the store.  Then I was done and it was time to go.

Its kind of weird.  We've been together for nearly four years (in June) so we've definitely done the whole "nesting" thing.  We don't need ANYTHING!!  So, when it comes to registering, its stuff that we'd like to have (like an avocado slicer) but not necessarily things that we NEED.  I think we ended up with probably 30 items total out of two registries.

Oh well.

Mom tells me my family members are asking if they can just give us money... she's telling them yes.  They all know that we've been together for a while, so its nice that they're not planning on adding to our storage conundrum.  All the same though, I'm just looking forward to having them out for our special day.

Otherwise, the Fi and I had a very lovely weekend.  It was his birthday Saturday (dummy me left his present at work) so we just sorta spent the weekend together.  We went and saw 21 (good movie!) and went for sushi.  Stayed in bed until noon on Sunday.  It was nice to just sorta be and not be so focused on wedding and work and everything.  It was wonderful to have the time to be "in love".

So, if I leave things alone...

Posted Wednesday, March 26, 2008 10:34 AM

Maybe they'll come together.

After getting a final quote from a different caterer, it looks like we'll be going with her.  She's not our first choice, but I think she'll be o.k.  I mean, she's what we can afford.  She told us her partner is the level headed one.  We haven't met the partner yet, so maybe it will be o.k. once we do.

I still have to figure out how to tell the OTHER caterer that we can't afford the service charge and thanks but actually... NO thanks.

That still rubs me the wrong way.  If there are twelve people at our party, that makes for a HUGE tip for each person!  Aaaahh!  If there are 12 people at our party (staff, etc) that means each person is getting more than $200.  Yeep.  Not to mention we'd be paying for 150 people, regardless of whether or not they all show.

Anyway.

After all of that, we had to take a brain break from catering.  I think my subconscious made the decision.

On the bride's maid front... well, I finally got to talk to my mom about it last night.  At first she was like "oh no... that's just your brother and her bantering"... but then I told her about all the other stuff... like the job thing and when should she be here, etc... and that sort of changed things a bit.

She said she'd talk to my brother (they're best friends after all) and see if she's actually into it, and there's just hideous miscommunication, or if this is just too big of a responsibility for her right now, and give her the chance to bow out gracefully.

So, we'll see.

I don't think I'm over reacting, but I guess anything is possible.

I'm really grateful for my mom in all of this.  She's helped so much, and I really don't think I could do it without her.

So, we're moving right along.  Waiting on a quote from the fi's DJ company of choice.  Hopefully we'll get that soon, and we can either put the deposit from them, or go with the other.

I knew once the catering thing was solved, things would go more quickly.

Thanks for listening everyone.  It helps a lot.  

past caring?

Posted Saturday, March 22, 2008 8:49 PM

So, I got a brief moment to talk to my brother this evening.  He's my man of honor, but works goofy hours at a hotel, and is thusly a bit difficult to get a hold of.

I have one other bride's maid, E, whom I haven't really had much of a chance to get close to, but she's a good family friend, and my brother's best friend.

Well, I honestly haven't asked much of my BP at this point.  Its kinda hard because they're in CO and I'm in NY.  I don't know that I'd really ask much of them anyway.  It would just be nice to have them here to do stuff with.

Regardless.

My brother's attire for the wedding is easy.  He owns his own tux for crying out loud.

E, on the other hand.... well, I sorta feel like its been drama since day one.

Green is my favorite color, and I think she and my brother were under the impression that this would be a color I pick for the wedding.  It didn't happen because the Fi and I chose to do a wine theme... thusly, I asked her to wear a red wine color.

I realize that this is sort of a nebulous color.... I mean, red wine can give off a variety of hues.  The major point was "red" thought.  I wanted her to pick something that she'd like.  I have any number of bride's maid dresses that I honestly can't envision EVER wearing again.

Anyway, she fought me on red.  She wanted Sage Green.

Then, she found a dress that was aubergine.  A very pretty color... but not exactly red wine.

Finally, my mom came out and we found a swatch of fabric (at E's request) so she'd have an idea on the color.

My brother took it up to Ft. Collins to her (my fam lives in Colorado Springs) and she found a dress at Goodwill.

Now, I truly have NO issue whatsoever with her purchasing her dress at goodwill  You can really find some nice stuff sometimes.  I found a prom dress once that I really loved.  It was so comfortable!

Anyway, I was talking to my brother about it and he lets it slip that she's "past caring" what I will think about the dress.

Excuse me?

I don't have bridezilla moments.  I'm really not that keyed up about the whole wedding business. (I haven't purchased a single bridal magazine.)

But where does she get off not caring what I (the bride) think about the dress that I gave her the freedom to purchase for our wedding day?

It should NOT have been that stressful.

Especially considering I haven't put any other pressures on her.  She asked me when she had to be out for the wedding (no plans for a visit prior) and said that she hoped she'd actually be able to MAKE IT OUT for the wedding, because she's looking at job stuff.

I don't think she quite gets it!! Its not just an invitation.  I asked her to be a bride's maid!! 

I'm afraid I was rather short with her after that.  I told her if she didn't think she was going to be able to make it then she should let me know as soon as possible, and that she absolutely HAD to be out by October 10 (for rehearsal).

This one really bugs me. I mean, what the heck am I supposed to say???  At this point, I'm starting to regret asking her, but I can't really un-ask her either.  It doesn't really sound like she wants to be a part of this fairly mellow (for a wedding) shindig anymore.
 

the tattoo

Posted Friday, March 21, 2008 2:31 PM

Yep. I have a couple.  Normally, they're no big deal.  I love them.  I thought long and hard about them before I got them.

Yet, now I sort of feel like a hypocrite.  One of the two is between my shoulder blades.

It will, of course, NOT be covered by my dress. 

Of course.

I haven't decided definitely whether I want to cover it up yet, but I've been researching how exactly I'd go about it.  Its surprisingly difficult to find recommendations (that don't cost a fortune) for covering my tattoo.

I mean, I won't be wearing a veil, and I plan on wearing my hair up, which basically means that everyone will be looking at my tattoo during the ceremony.  Its GREEN.

Ok. Maybe I do wanna cover it up.  I can love it and still not wanna show it for my wedding day, right?

Anyway, my darned cat stepped on the keyboard (gotta love it when they do that, right?) and ended up scrolling the page all the way down to the ads at the bottom and I see a site:

www.tattocamo.com

Quite possibly every website I ever wanted to see about tattoos... where to buy ink and needles... or where to buy stuff that fades them permanently.

I don't need a new one... nor do I want to fade it forever... but I did a search for makeup and found that Ben Nye does makeup for that.  Woo HOOO!! I've used Ben Nye makeup before (for Halloween and Ren Fest), and it works great!!  I wore a bronze color in the sun at Ren Fest all day one year and it never melted.  Of course, I still got a sunburn, but I digress.

So, it was good to find a brand that I trust and recognize.  Now, I'm wondering if I can go to the costume store on Broadway (they're open all year round) and see if they have ALL the colors.

Ben Nye is considerably less expensive than some of the other concealers I've come across, which is good.  I don't really wanna spend a lot of money on something I'd only use for the day.

Woo HOO!!