The Nest

An Update

Posted Sunday, July 06, 2008 1:15 PM

I just realized, I haven't updated in a week, and thats not like me. This is going to be long, so im warning you now :)

I went into the dr this past tuesday to talk to her about my possible PPD. Ironically when I went into the dr. I was feeling a lot better. I did however tell her how I was feeling and she didnt think it was PPD. She recommended me to a councelor.

I called this councelor to make an appointment and couldnt get in, until late july which is useless. Also to top things off, my insurance doesnt want to even cover half of this councelor, and I know they cost an arm and a leg. I called my dr. back but couldnt talk to her, I had to talk to the dumb receptionist *sigh*

I ended up going back to the dr on thursday to talk to her again. I was still feeling better. So for 3 days I felt really good. Alyssa had only been waking up twice at night to eat then going right back to sleep so I was getting at least 7 hours of sleep. When I talked to my dr. again, she didnt think it was PPD. Now that I think about it, I dont think I have PPD.

I think it was a huge combination of sleep deprivation, and breastfeeding so much. But things have been getting better so my attitude is better.

Last week before I called my dr. My husband and I had a huge blowup. I was really feeling alone, and like he wasnt helping. He would get up in the morning get on the computer play Call of Duty for hours, eat, lay down, get up play again, go to the gym, come home shower, play AGAIN until about 4am. Can you see why I was upset?

This went on for about 4 days until I had a HUGE _bitch fit. I came out of the room and just started screaming at the top of my lungs. He had NO CLUE what I was yelling about until mid convo. He really didnt know what he did wrong, which made me even more mad so we went in circles for a few minutes. Then he finally got a clue.

He tells me that he cant really help out when im breastfeeding. I told him there are times when she is fed and changed but still fussy, he can take her then. I also told him theres times when shes just awake, and likes to be held and he can bond with her then and give me time to take a 30 minute nap or even get in the shower. I had been taking showers when she would take a quick nap, the was the only time I could get one in, this was the same for when I wanted to eat.

So the past 3 days he has been helping out a lot. He has changed most of the diapers, and I just started introducing a bottle so he has started feeding her, its given me a huge relief.

This morning he took her fed her and gave me a break for 2 hours, so I took a nice hot bath. Oh to get a nice bath after almost 4 weeks of no bath was heaven! I just soaked and thought about nothing. I got out and ate some food at a nice slow pace because I didnt have to rush before she woke up. Then I boiled her bottles and pumped some more milk.

So my husband has made up for being an _ass last week, if he didnt, he was going to get the evil eye for weeks!