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The Groomsman's Widow

Posted Wednesday, March 12, 2008 6:55 AM

So DH recently found out that he's a groomsman <again> twice this upcoming wedding season.  In the last 3 years that we have been together, based on my count, he's been a groomsman 6 times.  So, it's great...he's a popular guy and a valued friend of many.  I am blessed to have such a great person as my partner.

What irks me is all the time that I have to spend alone at the events.  It's not always bad, since half the time it's with other friends.  But I hate when at weddings they almost always have a head table and I'm forced to sit at another table for hours.  I try not to sulk, but instead enjoy the free drinks.  But what makes it worse too is when the ceremony is earlier in the day...so DH is up early getting ready, taking pictures, at the ceremony, and then the long 4 hour gap or so of more pictures before the reception where then I don't see him for another 2 hours through dinner.  And then I have to watch him dance with some other girl. BOO!! (haha...).  I am a consultant and I travel a lot out of town for work many weeks, so it's kind of disappointing when there's a wedding weekend and we don't get to spend any *quality* time together before I have to hop on a plane again on Monday morning.

At our wedding, we had a more casual setup.  We had a destination wedding with 60 guests, and a wedding party of 6 (3 on each side).  At the dinner, we just had round tables set up and I purposely had the wedding party sit each with their own sig others or friends.  I guess that's the way I feel it to be logical ;-)

 I guess I'm just pouting and jealous, dare I say...since I've never been a bridesmaid (just a greeter and a reader), so I guess I miss the attention?!?

Posted by chi-wine-lady
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Comments

re: The Groomsman's Widow

It does bug you, I know.  I just got asked to be in a wedding for the first time, the only other wedding I was in was my own.  It is jealousy.  No matter how much a person hates to feel jealous, it sucks because you can't quite control it.  I've been there.  I feel better now that I get to be Matron of Honor at my friends wedding.  It is a lot of work.  But I went to one of the weddings where my Hubby was a groomsman.  It was very informal, no head table or anything like that.  However, when I got to the place where the ceremony and reception were, the Groom handed me a long list of songs and a ton of CDs, and asked if I could sit by the stereo the whole time and play their music selections.  Apparently, they had wanted to burn a couple discs with all the songs on them, but didn't get around to it.  I was thrilled! NOT!

Posted by MandyE-worth    Wednesday, March 12, 2008 6:18 AM


re: The Groomsman's Widow

Same with our wedding.  Destination wedding, 50 people, just had big tables where people could sit where ever with who ever they wanted.  I personally like it that way too, but I can see the reasoning behind a head table.  These are all the people who stood with you on your big day, and you want to highlight them for all your guests.  Usually brides/grooms are smart and seat all the wives/girlfriends and husbands/boyfriends of the wedding party together.

Posted by edmo    Wednesday, March 12, 2008 9:46 AM


re: The Groomsman's Widow

I can relate to spending weddings alone. DH works part time as a wedding  photographer and all his cousins who get married ask him to do their wedding. One of the weddings they had me sitting with a whole bunch of cousins I hadn't met...he stays away from that side of the family when he can. It wouldn't have been so bad if I could sit next to his parents, but it was a LONG night...

Posted by ermimac    Wednesday, March 12, 2008 5:45 PM


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