Sometimes, a girl just needs to cry.
Posted
Friday, December 07, 2007 4:45 AM
I've felt super sensitive the past few days. I just barely touched a hot pan with the middle of my finger during lunch and nearly started bawling yesterday. Today, I just couldn't stop thinking about a lot fo things while preparing dinner, and I finally just let loose: started yelling about how stupid immigration is, how unfair it is that two people who are so in love have to go through this ordeal while others are granted immediate citizenship for various reasons, sob, sob, sob. Right now, I feel like immigration is similar to communism: both are good in theory. It's not really that severe, no, but I am just so upset that all we basically get is, "check processing times online for more information," when we are well past the timeframes they show. Just a couple of years ago, you got the green card within a couple of weeks of marriage. Now, you are investigated and profiled like a criminal with more of a "guilty until proven innocent" mindset.
I understand why the rules have tightened up. Yes, there are a lot of bad people out there who abuse the system. However, how it stands right now is absolutely absurd. My husband has been under your radars for the past seven years or so. He has never been in an illegal status and doesn't even come from a moderate risk country. You know more about the both of us than probably even we do. What more do you want from us? What is it going to take?
I know plenty of others here have been through the process, have put in their time waiting, etc. I'm not trying to form a pity party here, not looking for people to say, "It'll be okay...see it worked for us/my friend/others!" I know it'll be fine. It's all in God's hands, in His timing. He already knows when we'll get the cards in, when our interview will be.
I know the real problem right now is with me, with my mindset. It's just so hard, though, checking the mail every.single.day with smiles on our faces thinking that today, yes, today!, could be the day we finally get some type of a notice in. Maybe today will be the day we found out when the interview will be so we can start moving forward with some of our plans.
The most important thing is not our plans, but the plans God has for us. This has always been my biggest struggle, so I think that's why it's hitting me so hard right now. I struggle with not feeling like I know where I am going. My husband and I talked and made a wonderful general plan for next year togehter, and I am just so excited to get on track for it! However, if it's not in God's plans, it's not going to happen, nor do I want it to. That conflicts with the "wants" we have right now, of course, because we want these things, but at the same time, we don't want them if God doesn't will them.
At any rate, I am still just trying to keep my head on straight and wait things out. We called our attorney today, so tomorrow, we will call back to the office to set up a time to go with one of his associates to InfoPass, if I remember the name correctly, to get them to tell the big dogs to hurry it on up since we are well past our 90 days mark. It might involve me getting knocked with "unscheduled PTO," but I don't care at this point. Us getting married was supposed to have relieved us from going through all of these sorts of pains again, and I'll do what it takes to help get this finished up for my husband, for us, for our future.
Other than that huge rant/thinking out loud on the internet (lol)...
My poor husband is sick, and he never gets sick. ;^; I've been tending to his every need. My little cuddle muffin.
I don't like the act of getting to a post office, but I love mailing things out! I mailed something out to my friend in FL today and some holiday ornaments for the International Nesties Ornament Exchange. Now, I'm looking around for what else I should send out. XD
Tomorrow marks five months for us! I can't wait until we start in on the years or until we start counting down the months of pregnancy, our child's age, our children's ages...^^;; We have so much ahead of us!! So many blessings ahead of us...
I think I have my head on a little straighter now. I'm off to shower and hit the sack with poor sickly hubby.