Sometimes memories are all we have
Posted
Thursday, October 04, 2007 3:08 PM
Lately I've been feeling like a wet blanket about a friendship that is so lodged in my past, I forget memories and moments that were once vivid in my mind.
The loss of this friendship has never sat well with me and soemtimes something will trigger a thought in my mind about my dear friend. I understand that life changes things, relationships change things and marriage changes things as well- but I can't help sometimes feel sad when I think about my old friend. I love when my hubby would see that I was down about my friend and would say: "so tell me about the crazy fun things you did w/your friend". I would get to relive good memories of a great and healthy friendship and my husband got to know a part of my life that he never knew because he wasn't around at the time. {Side Bar: I love that my husband is not intimidated by anything or anyone and knows that he is always #1 in my life and can be so secure in himself to ask about other people that have been important in my life in the past.}
The weird thing, though, is that the other day I came across an old picture of this friend and after staring at it for a couple of minutes- it almost felt like this person was a complete stranger- I no longer remembered much, like her voice, our conversations, it was like it almost never happened and it brought tears to my eyes to realize that someone who was so close to me at one point in my life has slipped so far away that she now exists only as an extremely faint memory in my mind. The realization of this made me so sad- I dont like to forget memories, smells, sounds, and people from my past- I love to look back on those times and smile and remember that I am where I am because of my past experiences and despite what may have transpired over the years she meant a lot to me and was a great friend whom I loved dearly and I never want to forget that.
