cry33303's Blog

New News

2008-06-04T16:02:00Z

So, last night was filled with news....I got home from work and decide to take a HPTtest. I have been headachey, crampy and have had a quesy stomach for about a week, so I decided, what if. And about 30 seconds after HPT it turned positive. I am infact pregnant! WOW, that happened fast!!! Here is what I am thinking...last months AF was 1 day, then nothing, then heavy, then nothing...and I counted it as AF....so I could be as little as 3 weeks pregnant up to about 6 weeks. I was so nervous to tell Kyle. He had a dinner with his boss/VP so he was late coming home...and once he got home, I was so nervous to tell him that it took about a hour to finally get up the nerve to tell him. Then I blurred it out...and he was...excited. He was shocked as well that it only took what 2 months? WOW, we are fertile! A baby! I just hopes this baby sticks...and we are indeed pregnant. I decided I would wait until next week to make an appointment, since AF is due tomorrow...just to make sure:) We decided to wait to tell the families until we are futher along...or atleast till we have a doctors appointment!! I started feeling guilty last night about my SIL. I mean we have dinner every week, and I have had to hid TTC from her and now I am pregnant and I am dreading that conversion with her, I just hope it doesn't effect our friendship in any way.

Other news...we got out bid on the foreclosure house:( Back to the drawing board.

....the waiting game

2008-06-02T14:52:00Z

We we offically out a offer on another house. This house is a foreclosure, so when we found it, it was a really good price (about $40K below market value), BUT it needs about $30K in updating and cleaning. So, once again we put in a low ball offer (almost $40K below thier asking price), this has become my DH signature move, but hey it is working out so far. Anyway, we got a call back within 24 hours. And low and behold it seems there is another bidder...with the same offer as us...and the requested us both to rebid...so we re-bid today, now we wait....the 1st waiting game going on in my life. Will i get this awesome 5 bedroom, 3 bath house with 3000 sq feet of painting and new flooring to deal with, or will we be onto another "dream house" later this week. Oh, the waiting game....

I am also patiently waiting for AF to come again! It is time. I was hoping that this month was the month for a postive preganacy test, but I am not feeling that hopeful. I have cramps...which means...AF is coming. This was the first month to chart, and I look at my chart and think 1st, what am I looking at, and 2nd it looks like I am pregnant to me (when I compare them to other BFP charts) Charting might make me crazy!!! But I guess it really is for the best if the BFP isn't this month. I mean, what if we did get the house this weekend that needs manual labor cleaning, painting and remodeling for a year, plus my salary to pay for all the new flooring and painting...what if we got that house, and a big BFP...then where would we be?

Just a blog...

2008-05-13T19:16:00Z

...to blog. T

hings are going well in my life. Let's see a quick update. We put a offer in on a house, a really low-ball offer that I thought would get us laughed at and result in no commuication from the seller. Low and behold, they countered, with something we still wouldn't pay ....so we ignored the counter...and they contacted our agent again with another, lower offer...still not in the ball park we were looking for (closer, but not there)...so we told our agent what we were willing to do...and we left it at that. I am hoping that it made it through the weekend, and they will come back once again...the seller has already found a house, and needs the money from the sell of the house we want for a downpayment. I'd say we are in the driver seat, and if they really want to sell...than it will happen! *fingers crossed* I love this house, and house hunting has brought out the worse in us as a couple, we get frusrated and are on the edge of each others nerves while driving around looking for a home, this should be fun, but for some reason we can't seem to make it fun!

Well, AF arrived, and I wasn't really surprised since I have been off BCP for only a few months, but I was hopeful that we suceeded in Key West, but alas, we didn't. So, we are going to cycle #2, and to add more pressure, we are TTC using the Choose the Sex of your Baby book...so we are aimming for a boy...yep, DH knows what he wants, so we are doing it by the book to say the least. Which means this month...no sex after AF until a rise in temperture signally O....(supposely the "boy sperm" are smaller and fast, but less hardey...and the "girl sperm" who are slower, but stronger so they last longer...SO if a boy is wanted...have sex as close to O as possible, but not before since the girls can live longer...also the "boy sperm" like akaline CM...so they recommend a douche too...and recommed DH to drink 3 cups of coffee before BD!...I am secretly laughing at this, but MIL swears by this books, says we used it with all 4 kids...boy girl boy girl) So, I want to make DH happy...and I will try to do it this way for a few months...until I can't stand it, then we are just going to have sex every morning and night!!! I want to be pregnant, I am excited, but still can't picture myself pregnant...I know DH will be a great dad too!

What else...no drama or anything going on right now, everything is pretty low key ....

on to MAY

2008-05-02T17:31:00Z

So, May begins...AF is due on Monday. I wonder, was this first month our month? There is no way we are that lucky, with all the bad luck we have been having with house hunting it wouldn't surprise me one bit if TTC was just us unlucky as house hunting. Things just don't seem to be falling into place like I would like them too. We find a house and by the time we see it, a offer has been placed on it, this has happened 2 times to houses we LOVED and 2 to houses we would be interested in. I thought this was suppose to be a bad market!!! It frustrates DH and me, and it stresses us out. It sucks. I offically hate house hunting!

So...back to TTC. I am on my prenatels and I am not sure if that is the reason for nauesa, headaches. fatigue and hot flashes ...or if it is the time of the month coming...or what is going on with my body. I am sure it has alot to do with coming of BCP. I am going to start tracking on FF as soon as AF shows her smiling face again. Oh the joys of TTC. I lurk everyday on BOTB and GP, still not posting...but I enjoy reading and learning from these girls. I think I will probably just always be a lurker, it seems to fit my life style the best.

Update...

2008-04-29T19:49:00Z

So, I went to the OBGYN yesterday for my yearly, questions about TTC and to discuss my weird AF. And everything went well. Weird AF is due to coming off BC, which I assumed. (I have been officially off since March). And she didn't see the need to do any blood work since I had it done last year and everything looked "perfect", not to mention last September I had a internal sonogram when I was having weird AF, due to stress and hormones being to weak, and everything was good then too. So, we are officially TTC. I left with a bag full of prenatal vitamins samples and in a good mood. Now, let me back up to Saturday night. DH mom swears by this book; Choose the Sex of your Baby. She keeps it on her bookshelf in the living room...DH stole it Saturday, it was his sign that he really is ready to TTC. He wants a boy 1st, of course. So, Sunday night we read the chapter, Boy Easier? And he is all doing everything this book says to have a boy...so starting at the beginning of AF in May (May 7ish) we will officially begin TTC...so charting and temp taking is a go....(the "book" says for a boy to have sex at the 1st rise of temp indicting O time, in the morning... and to abstinence before then, I am weary of this book, but it is worth a try!)....so here goes nothing! (oh I must mention DH will not say out loud we are TTC, he says it is to scary...lol). I hope I do not get to caught up in TTC and lose focus on my number one role in life, which is to be a loving wife...I will try not to make this a chore for us, and hope to keep it lighthearted and fun...*crossing my fingers and hoping I can do just that!*

So, today I changed my profile for friends to be able to see my profile only...and I took my bio off...only for the reason of protecting me from SIL. Whom I love dearly, but I am not sharing any of this with her, not until we are actually PG and past the 1st trimester.... this is my place to vent, share...and explore...so just in case it is her place too...I am private. While my username is a dead give away, maybe w/o all my pictures it won't be as noticable it is me...I am not even sure if she is on this site, but I know she used the knot for wedding planning. So, safey 1st right? Oh, speaking of SIL, DH said the other day "I think SIL is trying to get PG...and I think that is the reason she went to the dr" (I of course already assumed this) and I think it kinda bothered him too that once again we are all in the same boat...I am hoping for a miracle and to be PG now;) (but I was at the doctor yesterday and they did a POAS test...so I know that I am not PG yet) I think SIL is going to start TTC in August. She thinks I am starting in November. So, hopefully I will be PG before August, I know she needs to lower her

cholesterol, and just found out about a heart murmer, which is why I think she is waiting till August (then hoping to be PG by Nov)... I am not being ugly, I just want to be a few months ahead in PG and not be head to head with her like with the weddings. Call it selfish, call it whatever you want...I just know I want this time to be special, like the wedding was suppose to be.

I am back...

2008-04-24T19:21:00Z

...and Key West was a blast! Even though our house fund took a serious dent! It was worth it, we needed it! Now DH is in Chicago, and I am missing him. But I will be smootching on him tonight!

Let's see, Key West....all I can say is go. It was beautiful, Duval Street was a hoot...kayaking in the mangroves, snorkling in by the reefs was surreal, wine and cheese on sailing on towards the sunset-amazing. I could give you plenty of ideas of places to day and to eat...and who to use for different things...let me know.

What else...TTC. Still on a simmer right now, not boiling, but not off either! I go to the doctor Monday since I was having problems again with BCP and AF issues, so at this appointment I will get a new precription and talk about TTC). And because of this, at the moment we are not using anything (not even the C I bought for the trip, and that was DH idea), maybe he is coming around to the idea of TTC, but I know he isn't ready to commit 100% yet. He did make sure I noticed that we didn't use the C, kinda like it was his way of saying, see, I am not scared....and he is back to saying, you know if we are TTC we have to quit drinking...and little things like that...so I am probably getting my hopes up but after the appointment Monday he will let me know weather to start BCP again or not:) I still haven't started charting yet, I just don't want to get my hopes all up and get wrapped up in charting only to hear, lets wait till Nov as planned. I still lurk daily on the boards, and it is fun to me. I am getting to know all these girls who have no idea who I am since I never post! (I am realizing who the "mean girls" are...the sweet and sincere...the stuipd ones...you know...groups show up even to outsiders:)

I went out with my SIL again last night, and once again after a few ritas we were having a blast. She also has BOTB....bad. She is talking to me about it, being pretty open about the whole thing. (I secretly think that they are starting before she says too, but I don't blame her for not telling me. I know she has been to the dr for the pre-TTC and has had some test done...and maybe even off BCP too now...but I competely understand not wanting to tell me when since I am doing the same thing to her) anyway, I feel alittle guilty about not being 100% open with her about TTC, but DH request that I do not talk to her about TTC, he request no one knows until we are 6 weeks or futher along. He says it is about us and what we are doing, not SIL & BIL...so I have stuck with telling her 80% truths. I have told her I have SERIOUS BOTB, and that I wanted to start now, DH wants to wait till Nov as previously planned (which was true, but DH knows we aren't on BCP anymore and doesn't want to use C and makes sure I know he isn't using them, like I didn't notice he stop to put one on). I have told her we hope to be PG by Nov, which is true too...but if we get PG before, we are ok with that too:) *hopeful for that actually*

Anyway, wish me luck Monday at the doctor..who knows...during Key West trip was O time:) and we did plenty of BDing! (Atleast by my calucations, which maybe off since I am having two AF per month...whos knows what is going on with my body! This same thing happened last year) How awesome would it be to say, we get PG in Key West, on a romantic get-away, our "Key West Baby" is what DH said we'd call it...

Key West

2008-04-16T14:50:00Z

Yes...Key West we leave tomorrow morning at 6:00am (yes our flight is at 6am!!!) I am so excited, despite the early wake up time, 4:00am. We need a break. DH has been so stressed at work, stressed to the point of exhaustion every night. It has been wearing him down, and to say it hasn't had a effect on us would be a lie...but he is still his sweet self...but other things have had to give in to the stress, like inimate time, even kissing and hugging. SO, a week away from his stressful life will do us some good! AND even though I mentioned in my last blog that we would start BC again...we have not, my drs appointment isn't till Apr 28...and this weekend while in Key West would be ovalation time:) (I must mention I am not charting with temp taking...just guessiamates based on AF month to month) So who knows...I know better than to think I would be lucky enough to get P 1 month off BC, but how cool would it be to say we got P in Key West? But, since DH hasn't 100% comitted to the idea of a baby, I have bought a huge variety pack of condoms...that way we can avoid stress on vacation.... and the decision can be his

Ok, other than V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N...my life is pretty drab. I went shopping yesterday and fell in love with a coach purse...I WANT IT! but it is $258...geez...I have already spent my "allowance" this month...I am thinking about taking DH to see it and see if he will buy it for me:) *fingers crossed*

We also found another house, not quite as perfect as the other because it is $40k more, and not in as great of a school area...but the actual house and lot is more perfect! French style with a pool, and 1/2 acre lot!! DH has now ruled it out because of schools...i dream of this home...oh Redbud...it is perfect, but I have now offically found 3 perfect homes that we didn't get...so another is out there, right? House hunting is suppose to be fun, but I am finding it depressing and hard. DH and I are disagreeing...and that isn't fun. We both want simlar houses, but the things we are willing to over look on homes is different....that causes disagreements! I can't wait till we find the perfect house...ONE DAY right? Geez...vacation here I come, we have agreed to stop talking house and work while on vaca....just beachs, ritas, and relaxing...laughing and enjoying each other...like a mini honeymoon, a 6th month honeymoon! (I can't believe 6 months have past!)

Because it is Thursday...

2008-04-10T14:01:00Z

...and I feel like writing, I am here to to do just that. Last night I had dinner with my SIL, the sameone who got married the week after me, and I think I am finally getting to where I understand her. I think I am finally making a break through, and that just maybe be able to trust her and have the type of friendship with her that extends past SIL. I saw a side of her after a few margaritas that was vonuerable and honest...and living a parallel live with her I can see how hard her marriage must be. She is married to a cop who works like 3pm-11pm. She works a normal 8-4 job....so the hours they over lap during the week is a few hours (and that is because she makes herself stay up until he gets home...) Anyway, i sympthize with her. I can't imagine how lonely that life is. To eat alone, shower alone, get in bed alone...shop alone...etc. She let me in last night and I really enjoyed getting to know that side of her, the friend side...with that said I am still standing behind my decision not to share TTC when that stage in my life comes up, I just don't want to put anything on the table that could cause any grounds for competition or envy...or any other of those ugly scenrios that could come up. TTC will be mine and DH business, and once we are past the first critcal 3 months....then I will share with everyone else, including SIL.

So, we had our first blow at house hunting...we found a house...it was a jewel I tell you. PERFECT in every way. Trees, big yard...move in ready...I really could go on and on. We saw it Saturday and it had been on the market 8 days...we were thrilled...by Monday when we called to get a appointment to see it, it already had a contract on it-it actually had a contract on day 5!!! Heartbroken I tell you, I never thought I would get heartbroken over a house. We made the mistake of going to see it anyway...and the inside was as perfect as the out. So, we have our fingers crossed that something goes wrong with the pending contract...we can always hope right? *doubtful*

The TTC and DH has not come up again. So, I got back on BC on Sunday...and now I will wait. I was going to start tracking my AF, but decided I should wait till TTC before coming obsessed with charting, I think it would make the waiting harder (plus charting and BC don't seem to go together)....Frustrating. I want a puppy, he says no we aren't ready....I want a house, we need to wait till October....I want a baby, no we aren't ready. I know we both need to be on the same page, but why do I always have to step back down where he wants to be, and he isn't stepping up to where I want to be?

Ok, well I guess I should start my Thursday at work...I might visit the boards today:)