The Nest

I'm going to start lying for my husband's sake.

Posted Tuesday, April 08, 2008 9:33 AM

Last night Chris randomly said, "I am so excited to have this baby."  It was really sweet and came out of nowhere (he was watching Memphis and Kansas in the NCAA championship game).  Then he followed it with words that broke my heart.  He said, "I just wish you were able to enjoy it the way I am."  He knows pregnancy has been hard on me.  He knows I'm normally a very active and energetic person who is not used to be so tired and weak.  He feels genuinely sad for me that I have to go through the bad stuff while he merely experiences the anticipation and joy of the whole thing.

In order to relieve that burden from him, because I know it deeply bothers him that I'm not bouncing off walls in excitement and he wishes I could have the easiest pregnancy imaginable, I am going to start lying.  I don't feel the baby move yet and I can't pretend I do.  However, I can act like I'm not tired or nauseous, talk about how I love my growing and changing body, and tell him stories about how I felt great at work.

I love that he's so happy.  I want to be that happy too.  So perhaps if I say the following words to myself enough times, they will start to become real...

"That extra 25 pounds you've already gained at 22 weeks, it's okay.  You won't gain much more and you will lose it all after the baby is born."

"You aren't exhausted.  But maybe you should skip the gym and go to bed at 9 pm tonight."

"Not eating sugar is awesome.  You have learned that you don't need ice cream to be happy."

"That sick feeling is just temporary.  As soon as you lay down for half an hour, you'll feel 100% better."

"Those 36DDs are awesome.  Your husband loves them so just suck it up and deal with them because they are only going to get bigger after the baby is born."

(okay, maybe that last one wasn't as encouraging as I'm trying to make them)

"So what if your rings don't fit anymore.  Now you have an excuse to wear all kinds of new designs of wedding rings that are fake."

"You only aren't feeling the baby move yet because he's really mellow, and he'll continue to be mellow and easy after he's born."

(that one above is my favorite)

"Yeah, you can't do as much as you could do before.  Take it as a sign that this should be your relaxation time, and you'll want all that stored up energy for when the baby is born."