The Nest

My first sleepless night

Posted Wednesday, September 05, 2007 3:20 PM

I couldn't sleep last night. I tossed and turned all night, my mind unable to settle.  I understand what they say about wedding planning anxiety, and I've been planning my wedding all of one day.

 I'll go back a little, August of 06 my boyfriend proposed to me, gave me a beautiful diamond ring and then told me he wasn't quite ready for a wedding.  So for a year I've stewed, waiting patiently for him to decide he was ready, brushing off comments from friends and family and co-workers about the date... all the while only thinking about a date and getting him to pick one.

We told people at first "summer of 08", which slowly became August of 08.  As August of 07 ended last week, I realized that now it is time to actually think about it, he can't put it off any longer.  So the first thing I want to do is pick a date, but I concurrently need to find a location, and locations are by size, which means by default the first thing I need to do becomes make a comprehensive guest list. 

 I started by writing a list of everyone I could think of in the family/close friend department, but I would like my parents and his parents to also make lists of people that they feel would like to attend/are important to them.  I plan on cross-referencing the lists to make sure no one is left off.  We are planning to have the wedding/reception at a park, which won't really have too many size requirements, so we want to invite everyone who would want to be there. 

 I asked my mom at lunch yesterday, she was excited and asked about a due date for the list.  My fiancé called his mom last night, but she told him that it was our wedding and we should choose who will attend.  He says it sounded like she doesn't want to impose, but I feel I am asking her to.  She is from a different culture than I am and sometimes I think meanings get lost in language/cultural differences.  Also, my fiancé doesn't always chose his wordings carefully and I'm not sure how the request sounded to her.  So already, on the first night of wedding planning, I hit a snag.  I'm still hoping tonight we can go to their house and hopefully explain a little better what we are looking for (list of family/friends and input/help). 

As we sat on the couch watching Weeds, it hit me, we are really doing this now, we are really planning our wedding, there's no going back.  Although if every night's sleep is as poor as last night's and every day I hit a snag, I may just want to elope.