Posted Monday, October 31, 2005 2:25 AM
Hey everyone... I'm bored and figured I'd see what all this “Nest Blog” stuff was about. Not to mention I figured no one would be reading it anyway, so I might as well write what was on my mind.
Well.... I guess I'm supposed to write about married life, eh?
For starters, it's been wonderful so far. We've been married for about a month and a half, and I must say that my life has changed quite a bit! What was once “his” and “mine” is now “ours”... still getting used to all that! For instance, we just got a joint checking account, and are working on paying off some bills... first thing he did was rip up my debit card. I almost cried!!! LOL Naa, it wasn't THAT bad... it's just that he and I do things totally different dealing with finances. Me, I always knew that I had “about this much” money... and he knew EXACTLY how much money he had. He's getting my finances in check, you could say. Which is definitely a good thing for me!
I'm rambling, which I told myself I wasn't going to do in this first “blog” thing. It was just supposed to be a “hey how are ya, here I am” kinda thing. (Like anyone is reading this for me to say that to, but whatever.)
I'll write more later... I have two boxer dogs vying for my attention, and a husband who wants me to come upstairs.
See ya ;-)
Betsy
Posted Monday, October 31, 2005 3:21 PM
Happy Halloween everyone! Even though I have absolutely nothing planned for it...
I don't get to pass out candy tonight to the “halloweeners” because I have to work night turn. Oh well... once I have kids of my own, I guess Halloween will be exciting again. But for now, it doesn't really matter much to me. I still remember getting so excited to go out trick or treating... dressing up like a witch, a devil, a cheerleader, and--for my last halloween-- Little Red Riding Hood. Those were the days....lol I remember getting upset with my mom because I had a cheerleading costume and she was going to make me wear sweats underneath it because it was cold out....
I just wish some of my friends would have a halloween party or something. Last Halloween party I went to was about 3 years ago while I was working at the marina. That was sooo fun! I dressed as a renaissance girl... I had my hair all in ringlets and this cleavage-bearing dress ( I was very proud of it, thank you very much!)... and I actually had a date for it! Not my now-husband, the guy right before him.... lol Russ still teases me about that. He has no room to talk though, he had a girlfriend at the time....
Anyway... hope everyone has a happy and safe halloween, whatever you end up doing! If you go to a party, have a drink for me...
Posted Tuesday, November 01, 2005 2:32 PM
Hey everyone. I'm not sure if I should write this entry in this weblog or not... but this is a place to write what's on your mind, so why not, right?!
I shouldn't care about this, but I do...
The other night when I was updating my wedding webpage at The Knot, I happened to think about my ex boyfriend and how he has no clue I got engaged or much less that I got married. Yeah I should have told him, but really...we haven't seen eachother for over 3 years and so what difference would it make, right? We broke up in early 2001, after only dating for about 4 months. But that is just a relationship I will never forget. It was just different than any relationship I had ever been in. From day one of meeting him, I was hooked, and thought “this has the potential to be something great....” He was just the sweetest person and I was constantly walking on cloud 9 when I was with him. Everyone around me noticed that too! But unfortunately distance was working against us... we were at two different points in our lives. He was about to graduate college and move back home, which was even further from me... and I still had over a year of school left. So things ended rather abruptly, and it really broke my heart. I just kept thinking, “If that distance wasn't there, we could have made things work.” Of course, there were other factors that weren't going so great, but distance was the main one that ended things. So we kept in touch, and there was just always that spark between us, even though we weren't seeing eachother in person. We'd talk online, on the phone, whatever. Not all the time, but enough to keep in touch, pretty much over the next year and half. We told eachother that maybe this breakup was meant to let us see other people to truly know if we were truly supposed to be together...
After college graduation, I planned to save my money up for about a year, then move close to where he lived. Not just for him, but for the particular job I wanted to get. I have always wanted to work with kids, and wanted to work at the local children's hospital there. But anyway... I figured that being closer in distance might help things more... something in me just had to try to see if things would work.
Naturally, during all of this, we were dating other people, mostly not anything serious. I just kept comparing all the guys I dated to him. None of them matched up to all of his awesome qualities, and none of them made me feel like I did when I was with him. He told me something along the same lines, but I don't know if it was just him saying what he knew I wanted to hear or not....
So there I was, hoping to eventually move, get my 'dream job' and maybe even my 'dream guy' or so I thought at the time... and then I met my husband. And he had met another girl. When we talked online or on the phone, we would say little things about our relationships, but nothing into great detail.
At the beginning stages of the relationship with my now-husband, I was still so confused about things. Part of me kept thinking that maybe my ex and I would get back together, so I just couldn't open myself up to the fact that I was possibly falling in love with someone else. So I kept trying to get in touch with my ex. We would talk on the phone or online and I kept asking him to get together with me. Mind you, when we DID see eachother, things always got a little TOO friendly... so he would always turn me down. He kept saying, “You know what will happen when we see eachother.... we won't JUST talk.“ But seriously that's all I wanted to do. I never came out and told him, but what I wanted to do was sit down with him (not on the phone or through IM) and talk about what his feelings are about things.. because I pretty much knew where mine stood. Before I got too deep in another relationship, I wanted to know if we had a chance. All I was asking was for him to just TALK to me. Seriously, if he still felt for me what I did for him, I was ready to do whatever it took. Including moving. He doesn't know it, but I had a job lined up in Pittsburgh, had been looking at apartments, the whole 9 yards. But something just kept keeping us apart. He'd always say he had something going on when I 'd want to get together, or that “too many feelings would get stirred up if things went too far and someone would end up hurt.“ So nothing ever happened. I got tired of not being given a chance, and just gradually quit keeping in contact.
After all this, my relationship with my husband grew more serious, and as far as I knew it he was still with the same girl, so obviously that had to be serious too. I finally told myself that the past is in the past, and that I was sacrificing my relationship with my husband (then, only 'boyfriend') on something that might never be.
He probably wonders why I pretty much quit talking to him... that's why. I would be online and he'd IM me, and all these feelings would just come back...feelings I knew I had to put behind me. So I sat there and didn't write back. Part of me just wanted to put it all out there on the table and tell him what was in my heart, but something always held me back.
Looking back at it now, there was a reason something kept us apart. We just were not meant to be, as much as I always told myself we were.
I would not trade my relationship with my husband for anything in the world now. To be cheesy and quote Jerry Maguire, “He completes me.“ He really does. He is everything I'm not. His strengths are my weaknesses. He makes me feel like the luckies girl in the world when I am with him. I can wake up in the morning with my hair all sticking up everywhere, makeup running down my face and he is laying there smiling, telling me, “You're so beautiful.“ I could go on and on...but we'll leave that for another entry.
The reason for my rambling is this.
The other night when I updated my knot website, something made me think of my ex... and the fact that, “Hmm...he's been with the same girl for at least 3 or so years, I think“....
So there is a place on the main webpage where you can type in the person's name to see if they have a webpage. If you're reading this entry, I'm sure you know that. Anyway, I typed his name. I knew his girlfriend's first name from him telling me... and to my utter shock and surprise, up pops their picture on a Knot webpage... they're getting married.
I thought I would be upset, but I wasn't. I was truly happy to know that he found someone he can spend the rest of his life with, as I did. From reading the webpage, it really sounds like they are in love. I'm happy for them. You're probably thinking, “Yeah right, that's your ex, how can you be happy for them?“ but I am. I can say that because I am totally happy in my relationship now and all those 'feelings' I kept dwelling on, I've put behind me. Why risk what you have in the present, by dwelling on what's in the past?
If he were reading this (which he never will, I'm sure...), I would tell him congratulations and that I wish him all the best, and many many wonderful years of married life. It truly is a wonderful feeling to know you get to share every moment, every one of life's ups and downs, with the love of your life.
Another thing that I would tell him... thank you. Thank you for giving me some wonderful memories to look back on, and for allowing me to love again. Before you, I was not willing to open my heart to any man. You showed me that there ARE great guys out there that will treat me right. You allowed me to learn to love again.
Best wishes for a wonderful and loving marriage!
Posted Tuesday, November 01, 2005 4:25 PM
My dog..... ate my cell phone.
Chewed right through my smart chip.... all of my phone numbers are....... gone.
I'm gonna cry.
What a holy terror.
Posted Wednesday, November 02, 2005 12:00 PM
Just wanted to write in here real quick before I officially start my day. I got up early today to clean the house and do laundry, and I had to finish stuffing envelopes for my husband so he can send his end-of-the-month billing out to his customers.... now I have to go get a shower so I can go run some errands. I know, I know...you're jealous, wishing your day could be as exciting as mine...
Later I'll probably go over my mom and dad's...haven't seen them in awhile. I'm an only child, so this has been a big adjustment for them, me being officially out on my own. I mean, I was practically living with Russ for the past few years, but I still was over my parents' house alot too. Now the visits are a little less. One of my relatives asked my parents what it's like without me living there. My dad just got quiet and said, “It's...definitely different.” Made me feel bad. Gotta leave the nest sometime though, right? It was just hard for me... my parents and I are really close. So close that when Russ and I got married, he goes, “Are you gonna be over your parents house every day??” I haven't been though... I've been so busy lately. But I'll pay them a visit today, just to catch up. My mom's always so full of gossip when I go over there! There's always something going on in my family... good AND bad. It's always so funny to see my mom's face when she looks out the door and sees me pull up in the Explorer. Her face just lights up. Yeah....I think she misses me. lol
Not much else going on... other than going over my parents, I'll have to go to the bank to close my account out. We took all my money out last week and left just enough for the rest of my checks to clear. I officially have $0.00 in that account. *sniffle sniffle*
It's just gonna take awhile for me to adjust to all my hubby's ways of handling finances. For me, when I want to buy something, I just go buy it. Now, even though my paychecks are in our account, I feel like I have to ask him if I want to buy something. He says I don't have to though.... but I still feel like I do. I dunno.
It was funny the other night... we had this whole long drawn out conversation about finances. I gave him all kinds of scenarios about me spending our money. For example, I said, “Ok...so if I'm shopping and want to spend $200, I can?“ and he said yes. (Wonderful!) He just said he doesn't want me being impulsive or irresponsible about spending money. (Me, impulsive?! No.......) I'm just so used to having a debit card and access to money 24/7, having my own credit card, all that. Now he put my name on his credit card (cut MINE up!!!), so I'll technically have my own card but it will be *our* card. It's just that now, *gasp* he's gonna know how much I shop! LOL I do alot online, especially around Christmas time, and now he's gonna have to see the credit card statement, cause he's the one who writes the check to pay it off every month. Oh, what to do... LOL
Yeah, it's pretty safe to say that when it comes to me and my husband, our finances are where we differ the most. I mean, we are opposites when it comes to a lot of things, but this is #1 on the list. He is anal about finances. I told him that too, and he just laughed, cause he knows it. I've never seen anyone be so organized when it comes to bills and everything. He has individual folders for everything... you should see his office. Everything is in it's own little place, and he knows exactly where everything is at all times.
Little story about that...
One time I was in his office on the computer and used a highlighter at the end of his desk. After I was done, I put it back where any normal person would put it...in the pen holder he has next to the computer. Little did I know it was SUPPOSED to stay at the end of his desk. He told me that one day and I just started cracking up. So now when I'm down here I tend to move things around just to mess with him....
But anyway. I'm rambling again.
There are just so many things you discover once you're living with someone 24/7.... I've definitely learned alot about him (the good, the bad, and the just plain gross...LOL), and I'm sure he's learned the same about me... (all good or course!) But that can all be a whole new blog entry for another time...
You really know you love someone when you learn all of that, but your love doesn't fade one bit, it only grows stronger day by day. That's what's so awesome about being married...I know he loves me for me, and that I can totally be myself around him..I don't have to act like what I *think* he wants me to be. I am so looking forward to the rest of our life together.
Posted Sunday, November 06, 2005 8:38 AM
long phone conversations... clothes fresh out of the dryer...hot tea....steeler football...snowmen...fall festivals...making people smile... lotsa hugs and kisses.... surprise phone calls... finding old love letters...long walks.... picnics outside... looking at old photos... cuddling with my boxer dogs....being sarcastic...reminiscing...hanging out at the coffee shop drinking caramel mochas with my best friends...laughing til my stomach hurts... drawing... cooking...playing on the swingsets at the park....hearing windchimes on a breezy day... finding shapes in the clouds...sleeping in....sno cones...how comfy my vellux blanket is.... laying out in the sun...tulips....walks under the stars....holding hands... a good book... giving gifts for no reason....great smelling cologne... hearing babies laugh....a good joke.... candles....thunderstorms...karaoke....new cd's....butterflies....angels....snow...road trips...raspberry iced tea....curling up with a good book...singing at the top of my lungs while I'm driving in my car with my friends ;).... my comfy pj pants...nights out with "the girls"... shopping til I drop...honesty....trust.. hearing and saying the words "I Love You”...waking up to a kiss from my husband....
Posted Wednesday, November 09, 2005 3:11 AM
I haven't been able to write in here for a few days.... we are getting our basement remodeled and the fumes from paint and everything else have been rediculous! Needless to say, I haven't been on the computer.
My husband and I were sitting around watching some documentary on tv tonight about the spaceshuttle Columbia. He's all about things like that. Anyway, I was kinda bored after awhile, and told him we needed to go out sometime. This was pretty much how it went.
“Honey, we need to have a date night.”
“Date night?”
“Yes, date night. As in going out... you know, to dinner, a movie, shopping....”
“But we ARE going shopping this weekend.“
“Hun, going to Lowe's to pick out tile for the basement is not the shopping I mean.“
He just laughs and says, “Ok... well we'll go to Lowe's and then I'll, uh, go buy you panties or something. Is that shopping? Lowe's and panties?“
Men.
Posted Wednesday, November 09, 2005 3:30 AM
About me....
Sign: Aries...the fire sign!
Favorite color: Blue
Type of car you drive: '04 Ford Explorer
Favorite food: Anything Italian
Favorite restaurant: Olive Garden and Applebee's
Word you say way too much: Alrighty
Do you swear? Hell yeah, dammit!
What are three words your friends would use to describe you? Funny, creative, spontaneous
What is the last thing you ate? The dinner I made... roast, potatoes and veggies
Favorite non-alcoholic drink? Hot tea
Favorite alcoholic drink? Perfect Margarita from Applebee's
Do you smoke? No
Use drugs? No
Do you have a job? Yes
If so, what job? Registered Nurse
When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? Artist or designer
Do you have any tattoos? No
Piercings? Yes, 2 earrings in each ear and my belly button is pierced.
Do you get along with your parents? Yes, we're very close
What is your living situation? I live with my new hubby and our two dogs, Cody and Lucy.
Do you like to cook? Yes, love it. I think it would be fun to work as a chef...
What is your favorite season? Fall...I love everything about it- the weather, the festivals, the colors changing, football season...
What is your favorite holiday? Christmas
Favorite TV show? The Real World, Who's Line is it Anyway
Favorite Movie? Empire Records, anything with Adam Sandler
Last movie you saw in the theater: Hmm... it's been awhile. I'd have to say American Wedding. How sad is that, that was a long time ago! I'm more of a "wait til it comes out on dvd" type person.
Last movie you watched at home: Guess Who..... hilarious!
Favorite type of music? Anything but heavy metal
Favorite music group? Counting Crows, O.A.R, DMB, Lifehouse, Brownie Mary, the Clarks
Favorite individual singer? Alicia Keys, Joss Stone...
Cd in your cd player right now? Yeah... one I made that has a bunch of songs I listened to in college, OAR, Lifehouse, The Clarks, and Kelly Clarkson.
Magazines you subscribe to? Cosmo, a nursing magazine, BH&G
Favorite pasttimes? Movies, spending time with my family and friends, playing on the comp, anything crafty and creative, concerts, watching football--- GO STEELERS!, shopping, just relaxing....just depends on what kinda mood I'm in! I'm up for anything.
Last vacation you were on? My honeymoon this past september... we went on a cruise to Montego Bay, Jamaica; Grand Cayman Island; and Cozumel, Mexico.
Are you in school right now? Nope, graduated in 2002 from college, so I'm all done with that. Until I decide to go back again. I'm thinking about it...
Single or in a relationship? Married... for almost 2 months now!
What position do you sleep in? On my stomach
Do you snore? If I'm not on my stomach! Or if I'm reeeeally tired... or on a few occasions, drunk.
What is the last thing you had a dream about? I think it was something about work... I hate when I dream about work!!
Do you sleep with the tv or radio on? TV mostly. I could sleep through a damn tornado, so luckily I don't need complete quiet.
Get up early or sleep in? Sleep in. I work steady night turn so my sleep pattern is totally screwed up.
Do you wear clothes to bed? Yes, usually a t shirt or something. Unless it's reeeeeeeeally cold out. Then I might add socks.. hehe
Favorite time of day? Night time. I'm a night owl.
What do you eat for breakfast? Cereal or toast usually. And hot tea. Unless I meet my hubby for breakfast then I'll get the other stuff that I'm too tired to cook for myself at home... :-)
Do you drink coffee? Sometimes. I'm picky about regular coffee though. I like the fancy coffee drinks...I loooooove my caramel mochas!
Do you sing in the shower? No. I'm lucky I'm awake in the shower
Favorite article of clothing? My comfy pj pants from Old Navy. And my AE jeans.
What jewelry do you always have on, if any? My watch, earrings
silver or gold jewelry? Silver right now. I go through phases with that though. I like to change it up every once in awhile.
Coke or pepsi? Both, but I like pepsi more.
Vanilla or chocolate? Chocolate
Favorite ice cream flavor? Edy's Cookies and Cream
hot or cold? Hot
butter or margarine? Margarine
Beer or wine? Wine from the Breitenbach Winery in Amish country :-) And if it has to be beer, I prefer draft Bud Light!
Favorite fruit? Pineapple and strawberries
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That's all for now...