JandJ-A's Blog

Yay!

2008-05-19T17:35:00Z

We've got our finances under control. We still have quite a bit of money left from that loan we took out. We put the leftover money in a money market and have been able to add to it since our monthly bills are cut back significantly. We're excited and happy about that. Finally, the money we're saving is adding up to something that we can use for our wedding expenses.

His little bro finally paid the cell phone bill. He wasn't that thrilled about it, but too bad. He ran up the bill, he had to pay for it. Unfortunately, now he's in big trouble with the law over something that he didn't even do. There were several witnesses who even gave statements that he wasn't involved in any way, shape, or form, but the law in that county isn't famous for being fair. It is all so very frustrating. We just have to wait this out and see what happens.

We still haven't really planned anything lately, so there's really not much to add. Hope you ladies are enjoying your planning.!!

Family Update

2008-04-02T21:41:00Z

Well, my beloved FI's little brother still has not paid up his $500 cell phone bill. The bill has now gone to a bill collector and I have to honestly say that I blew a gasket when I opened that envelope. I forced FI to confront his little bro about it. He got so angry with him that he started yelling at him over the phone and then hung up on his little bro before he could yell right back. Now, my FI NEVER yells, so I went running outside to see what the heck was going on. My, my; he finally had enough of his brother's stupid antics.

His little sister confided in FI face to face 2 weeks ago that she's pregnant and is going to marry the baby's father. (She and the little bro are frat twins, 18 yrs old). He called me and told me that I needed to call his sister and talk with her, support her, blah blah blah. The dummy wouldn't tell me why, though, but I figured it out right away. When I talked to her, she broke down in tears and confessed. I felt awful 'cause I couldn't be there for her physically.

This whole situation apparently has torn her immediate family apart. The parents are very supportive of her and her decision. The eldest bro and his stupid wife demanded that she have an abortion, ditch the dad, forbade her from continuing to live with their parents, and are forbidding her from all contact with their child. (Like any of those demands are within their rights to make. Puh-leez!) The twin bro sided with older bro (I'm telling you, he's an idiot) for a few days and even moved out of the parents house for a while. FI has stood by his little sister and has offered our support to her and the father.

Now, neither one of us really cares for the baby's dad, but we don't have a say in this. Our best option is to back her up and be there for her. The two got married this last Sunday. Older bro and wife were fuming when one of their cousins and I arranged for their child to take a picture with little sis and new hubby. Please. Like either of those two idiots would tell me anything. They know I will tell them off; and besides, either of them says anything to offend me or does anything to hurt me, FI will be on them like stink on a skunk. Idiots.

Our credit cards are paid off. Except for my gas card, and that was a deliberate choice on our part. But I was annoyed to get a bill from one of the cards for $66. I knew I had paid it off. FI called the company and basically, I'm being charged for the privelege of having such a high credit limit. Me thinks not. I will be closing that account. Why should I pay for a bill that has a $0 balance? Morons.

Anybody watch Clean House? I do. I played the "game" over my Spring Break at my sister's house. Now I'm on her like stink on a skunk to keep her house clutter free. Hey, she told me to. It's only like the millionth time since she got married that I've had to do this. I flat out told her that if it started up again I wasn't going to bail her out again, so she told me that I need to be the twin from hell and drill her about the condition of the house. I've already raised my voice at her a few times about some junk that was left out, and I've gotten after my niece for leaving her toys out. My BIL escaped my rants since he has blessedly learned that once I say to do something, it had better get done (he's survived my wrath twice since they got married). =) No, I didn't yell; I raised my voice. I'm a band director, at a middle school, downtown; I know the difference between yelling and raising my voice.

We haven't really made any more wedding plans, so there's no update on that. I hope that all is going well with you all.

Best wishes and happy planning!!!

There is light at the end of this long tunnel

2008-02-29T22:23:00Z

FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are on our way to finally being able to save money for our wedding. It was a long and painful process, with many tears on my part, but it's finally looking up for us.

First, though, his truck broke down last week on our way back from his parents house (they live an hour away) last Monday night. The last 30 miles took us almost an hour to get home. The truck still ran, but we parked it after that.

Tuesday, I had to get up earlier to take him to work; he then had to leave early to take me to my other job.

Wednesday, I took a personal day to take care of business with the truck. We had it towed to the dealer (he already knew what was wrong). I went to his work for lunch, went to my school to have rehearsal with my Advanced Band , went back home, started my first online class , then went to pick him up. The bad news: while we only owed 3000 on his truck, the repair was estimated at 6500. That night, we dug up a loan application that I had received in the mail from Upromise. They approved us for a loan and the relief was immediately felt.

Now it's the end of the 2nd week. The loan money is half gone on paying off his truck and the repairs. Not to mention some of our credit cards as well.

Before anyone thinks that we'll never get out of debt now because of this loan, think again. The loan is enabling us to pay off credit cards and his truck. This frees up about $1000/month between the two of us. But since we will now have the loan, we still will have quite a bit of money freed up once we start the payments in April. We figured it all out before we applied for the loan. We were VERY cautious with our plans and knowing that we were approved made a big difference. We will still have money left over once all the bills are paid off, but we don't plan on spending that. We talked it over again last night and we are looking to see where we stand with the loan and the bills we want paid off.

Do you have any idea of how great it is to pay off the balance on credit cards? Especially ones that you haven't used in years and don't even remember what it was that you bought with them.

This has been a good blessing for us.

Happy planning!!

Ho Hum

2008-02-17T21:36:00Z

There have been no updates as to our wedding. We've both had a lot of things going on that we haven't talked about anything.

Valentine's Day came up fast, and neither of us was prepared. He usually has something for me weeks in advance, but this year he was forced to ask me what I wanted since he was drawing a blank and we'd been so busy to even think. I couldn't think of anything. So, Wednesday night, I told him that since I was going to this big music educator's convention, he could pay for either the convention fees or for a new flute bag I've had my eye on for years. He said that was fine. The guys at his work were shocked when he told them that he wasn't getting me anything for Valentine's Day. They thought that I was going to murder him and they suggested that he stop somewhere after work to get me something. He then told them the situation about the convention and they all just got mad. They said he had it easy with me. That he needs to hold on to me. Ha!! I got a kick out of that. So now I have my flute bag; red of course, in honor of the holiday that it was bought for. Please no comments about "Band Camp".

Humbug kind of day

2008-02-04T22:35:00Z

I don't have much to update on the wedding planning. We went out and looked at rings Sat. night, but nothing really jumped out at us. He wants something that's going to irritate his sister in law and that won't scratch the hell out of my hands and arms and legs and face. I just want something nice.

We are taking care of his cell phone issue. His entire account is going to be shut down and his little bro will have to just suck it up and deal - as well as pay for the bill and early termination. I have a 3rd line on my acct., so I'm going to add dear FI to it. His little bro really pissed me off when he complained about having to give 1/3 of his hog money to pay a bill and that now he's going to have to slave his life away to pay bills. Hello???!!!!! What in God's name does he think we do everyday? He's such a little moocher. And their parents are not going to help him out of this either. Their mom said that he was old enough to run up the bill, old enough to pay for it, and well past the age of getting a job. I flat out told him since he was being such an a** about the whole thing, he needed to repay me the $200 I paid in December for their phones to be on again. The little turd. Ugh!!!!!!!!!!! He makes me mad!!!!!!!!!!!

I Love A Bargain

2008-01-21T05:10:00Z

I bought a couple of wire baskets from Wal-Mart. They have some out for Valentine's Day and I figured that I would get 2 of them for the flower girls. They're pretty cheap. And FI is happy with the price.

Still no ring, but I'm not worrying about that anymore.

His little bro ran up their cell phone bill again...2 weeks after he'd just paid it. He's really ticking me off now. That boy needs to get a job and quit mooching off of everybody.

I hope you are all having fun planning. I'm taking my time and looking out for bargains. Let me know if there's anything out there I could possibly use. No idea is too dumb for me at this point, or too cheap. Remember, bargains are my best friends right now.

Happy planning!!!

There's hope yet

2008-01-05T22:57:00Z

I went online and picked out a couple of rings from JCPenney. The karat weight is less than what he's fixed on, but he thought they looked nice and it made him happy that I really liked them and that they cost much less than the others we had looked at when we first got engaged (years ago; literally). Now to go and look at them, try them on, and see if they look as nice on me as they do in the picture. Sorry, but I'm rather pleased with this step forward.

I have been looking through pictures and stuff here on The Knot and I've been able to get some ideas for centerpieces that can be done at home (thanks to Wal Mart and other discount stores). Also, my twin sis makes/sells soaps and candles and stuff, so I can ask her to do the favors for me (with my help, of course). I'm sure that I can get FI's little sister or his mom and grandma to help as well. My oldest brother is also creative, so I can use his talents just about anywhere.

I found a "card fountain" in the Dollar Aisle at Target, so I snatched that up. I also found some wedding themed computer paper at Dollar Tree and I snatched up a couple of those. I'm going to use that paper to make my own "Save the Date" announcements.

So now I just need to wrangle a date out of him. And save the money for the more expensive stuff. He wants his mom and grandparents to cook, so we don't have to worry about a caterer. We're members of Sam's Club, so we can buy the plates and stuff there. And his mom also knows where to get an excellent deal on quality beef/chicken.

I'm wavering on my dress. He wanted his grandmother and mom to make my dress, but his mom told me that his grandmother was only ever going to make his little sister's Sweet 16 dress, and that was 2 years ago. So when I told him, he was upset, but I pointed out that my older sister is excellent with dressmaking, too. So I'm thinking of asking her, but at the same time, I'm thinking of just searching for a decently priced dress and adding on to it if need be. I haven't decided, though. I'd love to have my sis make it, though. It could be my gift from her ... for the rest of my life.

I am so glad that I didn't cancel the engagement after all. That would have been the biggest mistake of my life.

Wedding Woes

2008-01-02T03:05:00Z

Last night, or early this morning, I asked again when we're getting married. He actually got mad this time. I couldn't believe it. Not to mention how hurt I was.

We've been engaged for so long, but have had to change the wedding date so many times I've lost count.

There's always something. Death in the family. Illness in the family. Now, it's money. Every time we save money for the wedding, we end up having to fork it over for something or (more likely) someone else. This last time, it was a new truck part (but that was an essential expense) AND the disgustingly high cell phone bill his little brother ran up. That's about $600 right there.

I keep telling him to cut his little brother off. He promised to get a job to pay for his cell phone, but here it is 1 1/2 years later and he hasn't done a darn thing!! Except for run up the bill. His little bro keeps saying that he doesn't want to work all the time like his brothers do. DUH, you moron!!!!!! How does he think that anybody is able to pay for the things that we have??!!!!!!!!!!

The money issue is so bad, that he can't even afford to get me the engagement ring that he wants. I don't care, really. He bought me an emerald ring a couple of Christmases ago; I'd be happy to use that as my engagement ring. But, no; not good enough for him.

I told him last night that we should just cancel the engagement. There's no sense planning or even talking about it. From where I'm standing, it's not going to happen anyway. Boy, were his feelings hurt. I don't mean for us to break up. God, no!! I just mean for us to stay together and not even worry or think about getting married. Since we can't afford a wedding. I even tried suggesting getting married at the court house or eloping, and he about blew a gasket!!! So I took that suggestion back.

And before anyone suggests that we get a second job, let me tell you what we do. I am the Assistant Band Director at a local school and he is a Diesel Mechanic. Not only that, but I also work part time for Sylvan Learning Centers and he works part time at a ranch he's been with for years and years. Even with both of us working two jobs, money is tight.

Our whole wedding was going to be somewhat small anyway. We were going to ask some of our family members to cook, bake, and help with wedding favors. Does anyone have any suggestions?