Life & Death
Posted
Friday, May 23, 2008 10:02 AM
I've got two things on my mind this morning: life and death. More specifically, I'm nervous that I might be pg (life) and I just found out when my grandfather's service is going to be (death).
First: Death - ok so I think my step-grandmother needs her head examined. She's planning my gp's service for the Saturday before Father's Day, which coincidentally is exactly one month after his death. I'm a little ticked for 2 reasons. 1 - my gp was more like a father to me than my father was and since my father is dead, Father's Day is a sad day for me no matter what and this is just going to make it worse. 2 - why is she waiting a MONTH???? The other funerals I've been to, people have waited a few days, maybe a week, before having the service. Her excuse was that she needed to make time so people can get their plane tickets, etc. Honestly, anyone in our family would do whatever they had to do to get there no matter when it was, so I really don't think it is necessary to wait a month. I just hope that everyone realizes that I may be especially b!tchy. Ugh.
Second: Life - I mentioned a few days ago that I thought I might be pg but I was attributing the feelings to just being a little under the weather. Anyway, yesterday after lunch another dept ordered pizza and it took them like 20 minutes to come down and get them. Usually, the smell of pizza just makes me hungry, but yesterday, I thought I was going to puke. It was not appetizing at all. I suppose it could have been because I had no sleep Wednesday night and drank way more coffee than I am used to yesterday. Anyway, I feel like I am driving myself crazy thinking that I am pregnant. You may be saying to yourself "well why don't you just POAS?" -- because I am nervous that I won't be pg. Weird huh. Since I got off BCP, everytime AF came, I got so disappointed even though DH and I aren't really TTC (ie I'm not charting or anything like that). He knows it too, that I get disappointed that is. I want to be pg, but I just don't want to deal with the disappointment if I'm not. I sound like a freak. Maybe I'll just POAS tonight and get it over with.
Anyway, I hope everyone has a great Memorial Day weekend! I'm going to test drive a few hybrids (hopefully!)