The Great Debate
Posted
Tuesday, December 11, 2007 7:26 AM
My little sister just got married. My fiance and I were the lucky ones to drive the new couple home (they were a bit intoxicated), and I asked them the question I've been dying to ask all night:
"So, was it worth it? Or should Matt and I just elope?"
No hesitation, no looking at each other to silently agree, no thinking about it for a half-second, they reply in unison:
"ELOPE! ELOPE! ELOPE!"
"I can't believe I spent more than $10,000 on that!" He cried.
"I can't believe I was so stressed over that little party!" She exclaimed.
Hmm...what now? Sometimes, I think about all the money I'll be spending on our wedding, and ask myself: "Why not drive-thru a little chapel down the street, in a brand-new Hybrid SUV?" You wouldn't believe how hard that is not to do in the wedding capital of the world. I imagine our down payment on a log cabin in the snowy woods. Or a paradise, month long destination wedding in Fiji. Anything but a snowy wedding where half my guests will think I'm crazy for having my wedding in January and the other half will be too drunk to remember who the hell is getting married in the first place.
So I pester my fiance:
"My mom has to be there. She'll kill me if she isn't."
"I can't wear a bikini to my wedding, I'll never show anyone the pictures!"
He tells me to take some time, sleep on it. And I do. And in my dream, Bob Barker is asking me if I know how many cats can get spayed and neutured with $15,000. And then I dream a Fijian tsunami wipes out the entire wedding party, and all the favors I worked so hard on.
And so, I seek help. I ask Amanda, a girl I work with who got married last year (when I first met her, so I didn't get invited), who everyone says had a gorgeous wedding, and my co-workers still talk about her crazy bachelorette party. Amanda is wise. Amanda is smart, and responsible, and it doesn't hurt that her other job is with a credit counseling firm. I tell her about my sister's taxi confession, and my nightmares. I tell her about our dream of owning our own home. I ask if she has any regrets, if it was worth it.
"Yes," says Amanda-the-wise-one. "Because I got everything I wanted." Amanda spent more on her wedding than I'm planning, and it was perfect, because she got exactly what she wanted.
And I think about my quaint, intimate ski-lodgey/log-cabiny venue, and my mom crying because it was so perfect and I think
Yes.
Because it will be everything I want.
Posted by
oneluckygal
Filed under: sister, elope, fiji