Stuck in a gray area...
Posted
Friday, May 02, 2008 1:28 PM
I am officially boring today... I have nothing new to report on in my life. I am stuck in this gray area that prevents me from both moving forward or going back. This applies to my job (although I am content with this), hubby's new business, the selling of the condo, the buying of a future house and possible plans for TTC.
In waiting for this time of being stuck in gray to pass, i have been thinking a lot about how different my life could have, would have been had i taken different paths...
For example, what if i hadn't become a designer... i've always loved animals, and for a while thought about becoming a vet. or what if i had continued with dance, gymnastics, karate, piano lessons... would i be a superstar in that area? or what if i was never adopted? i would be living in korea doing who even knows what? what if i never had that fight with j, i would have never hooked up with rob and subsequently married him... who would i be with? what if i had stayed with x, y, or z ex-boyfriends years ago? would i have had children by now?
I guess when it comes down to it, i truly believe that everything happens for a reason. i think God does have a master plan for us all, and although i sometimes lose faith in Him when things aren't going the way i think they should be, i just need to relax and maybe take time to try to enjoy being in this gray area... who knows maybe if i stop and look around long enough i might appreciate the break from the furious pace of life. maybe the famous phrase of its about the journey, not the destination has some truth to it?