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Thursday, October 26, 2006 8:22 AM

Why do you want to have kids?

By Heather

I'm sure many of us have been asked the question, "When are you going to have kids?", but have any of us stopped and really considered why we want them?

I have been married for over seven years and I'm at that point in my life where most of my friends and family are having kids. And honestly, I feel left out. Like all of my girlfriends have joined some special club and I am not allowed to join it.

When we get together with friends, the guys go off and talk about sports and business, while the girls get together and talk about their children. It is as if the identity of all of my female friends has been swallowed up by their kids and their lives now revolve around them. I sit and listen, but I have nothing to contribute.

The pull of wanting to join the club is strong, but I don't think that having kids because everyone else is doing it is a valid reason. So I'm asking those of you who have kids or want to have them -- what are the right reasons? And how would you recommend those of us who don't have kids fit into this world that seems to revolve around them?

Posted by The Nest Editors

Comments

re: Why do you want to have kids?

Its was so weird to see this question on the 26th DH's birthday...Its always kinda messy with divorced parents(his are) around birthdays...he doesnt really want a big deal made and I love making a big deal about his birthday... (I know this is kinda drawn out but there is a point) His dad and stepmom his uncle(godfather) and aunt and my parents came for dinner last night..(we had his mom and boyfriend last year)...What a time they all had talking about growing up and parents and siblings and all those amazing bonds that form in a family GREAT stories that are now the legends ...I know my husband and I are "family" but I would soooooo love(and I long for) that bond that connects all of his history with my history and becomes our future. The half him half me that is from the fact that we love each other. Are we less of a family if it doesnt happen, absolutely not. You definitely have to want it! I was a nanny and its not easyyyyy raising kids...you can have just as satisfying a life without ever parenting, the focus is just different, its aLL you 24/7.

Posted by MoDchiCk    Thursday, October 26, 2006 12:20 PM


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