Tuesday, March 20, 2007 8:44 PM

Small Talk

By Jeanine

If you've been keeping up with our blog, then you know (1) I recently moved into a new apartment and (2) I am in a bit of a financial pinch right now. So given my money situation it's probably not surprising that my new digs are a bit sparsely furnished. I have the basics (a couch, a mattress and a TV) and even some luxuries (a sweet dining room table!), but my apartment is essentially empty -- so much so that when I walk or talk or basically make any noise, there's an echo. Yeah, it's that bad.

So, my birthday was last Thursday and one of my aunts offered to buy me a piece of furniture. Well, let me rephrase that. After raving about how much she likes this décor site she said, "Oh, do you have everything you need for your new place?" Surprise, surprise – I say no, but I am still getting settled in. She then says, "Look on that site. Find something you like, send me the url and I'll buy it for you as a birthday/housewarming present." I laugh it off and say okay, but I really have no intention of sending her a link.

Fast forward to yesterday and I am talking to my mother who says she's talked to my aunt who wanted to know if I found anything I liked on the site. I explain to my mom that I didn't think she was serious about buying me something and even if she was I just wouldn't feel right having her get me something so expensive. Well, my mom thinks she wouldn't have offered if she didn't mean it and that it would be rude not to at least acknowledge the offer by sending her a link to something.

I am still not sure, though. Whether or not I could use the "gift" is not what's in question (need I remind you about the echoing), but I'm just uncomfortable with such a big present even if it is from my aunt. What do you think? Should I take her up on the offer or is it safe to assume she was didn’t really mean it but was just trying to be nice because it was my birthday?

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Comments

re: Small Talk

Well I agree with your mother that if she did not want to get you something off that sight she would not have offered. Also I am pretty sure she knows how expensive the stuff is on that sight. So I say choose something and if you are that self conscious then choose the thing you like that is the least expensive. But I say you should pick something and that is very nice of your aunt.

Posted by kizldg4    Tuesday, March 20, 2007 6:13 PM


re: Small Talk

Did you look at the website?  How do you know she wasn't talking about, oh, a vase or something?

Posted by lawright    Tuesday, March 20, 2007 11:11 PM


re: Small Talk

I say pick a range of things you want/need and have them range in price.  Then she can choose how much she wants to spend.  I would also, but it's not necessary, tell her she doesn't have to buy you anything but that you appreciate the gesture.  Everyone wants someone to buy them something nice and expensive but when it happens it is awkward LOL!  Good luck!

Posted by Beka&Nate    Wednesday, March 21, 2007 10:37 AM


re: Small Talk

She's your aunt, and obviously the two of you are quite close. So be upfront with her. Say something like, "Aunt Very Nice, this is so sweet of you and I appreciate it so much. There are so many things on this site, though...so I'm wondering if you could help me narrow things down by telling me about how much you would like to spend?

If you are too uncomfortable bringing up the money directly, then say something like, "What type of gift would you like to buy me?" As in: dishware, furniture, a painting...etc.

HTH.

I really think it's ok to let her know that you are excited by her offer, but need help.

Posted by joyfulnature    Wednesday, March 21, 2007 12:32 PM


re: Small Talk

What if you call her and invite her come over for lunch and "cyber shopping"  that way the two of you can pick out your gift together.  Say you'd really like her input since she's the one buying it and you can't decide.  That way as you're shopping you can get a feel for what she had in mind as far as price goes.

I agree with your mom.  She wouldn't have offered if she didn't want to buy you something.

Posted by hesthe14me    Tuesday, March 27, 2007 8:36 AM


re: Small Talk

Pick out 3-5 things in different price ranges, and let her pick.

Posted by rae76    Tuesday, March 27, 2007 4:05 PM


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