Sex & Romance

My husband on top of another girl?!?

AChambers18 — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 17:25:51 GMT

SO..

There seems to be many conventional marriages on this board...I am currently in that category. However, I would really like to open our relationship up. 3somes, more somes, individual relationships, couple swapping, IDK i'm pretty open as far as that goes.

My question: How should I approach the subject to H?

Also, those in open relationships or other unconventional marriages, how do you make it work? Any tips, suggestions, advice?

Help me decide - mirena or nuvaring?

sassyzta — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 17:46:18 GMT

I am looking for a new birth control method and I was wondering if you guys could give me your opinions.

My husband and I do not have any children and will probably wait another year or two before trying to conceive. I was on birth control pills for about 11 years and recently decided I was tired of them and I didn't want the hormones in my body anymore. However, as soon as I quit taking them, my husband was put on medication that can cause birth defects and his doctor said we had to use more than a barrier method for birth control. He will be taking this medicine long term for arthritis and will only stop taking it when we decide to try to get pregnant.

So, I went to the doctor today and she suggested Mirena. I guess I'm just a little nervous about going with Mirena, although it sounds like a great option. According to her, there are no side effects like you would get with the pill since the hormones are localized and do not enter your blood stream. She said it is easier to insert if you have had a child but she has inserted plenty of them in women who haven't had children. I know the commercial says its ideal for women who have had at least one child and thats the part that makes me nervous. Is that only due to ease of insertion? The doctor said it was immediately reversible. But, i'm being paranoid because I want to be sure I will still be able to have children if I go with this option.

The other option was the nuvaring, which she said has more side effects than mirena, but less than the pill.

Any opinions?

TMI: no period after depo shots? (long-ish)

Kat&Dave091909 — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 22:01:07 GMT

****I'm sorry, this is really TMI for some people, but I needed an outside opinion before turning to my doctor****

I'm going to preface that I am on BC (Loestrin) and on a fe medications that make BC slightly less effective. I had a whole slew of endometriosis two years ago, and have been through 2 rounds of Lupron Depo shots (which I will never, ever do again if my endometriosis comes back - it makes you bat-s*** crazy).

Both times, my period stopped while on the shots (I was on the BC for protection while taking the Depo - we also used condoms). The first time, my period came back a month after stopping the shots. This time, my period never came back and I only did the shots for 3 months, not 6 months. I haven't had a period since February of this year.

Since getting married, my DH and I have sort of thrown caution to the wind and stopped using condoms. I'm still on BC, but wanted opinions on whether or not I should be worrying about getting pregnant or not, considering I'm not getting my period, at all? Should I be taking a pregnancy test once a month? What do you think? Anyone have an experience that is similar?

TIA!

No sex drive, not on BC

cricket6614@yahoo.com — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 22:53:51 GMT

OK, I am in my 20's and I have no sex drive. I am not taking birth control. I have been in this relationship for a little over four years now. When it was "new" i was very interested in sex. But I would say for the last 3 years I have had no sex drive and cannot have an orgasim (have never been able to). Any advice?

Not taking placebo pills

foolforyou — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:17:18 GMT

I was wondering if anybody just started a new pack of pills after ending their old one. I do this pretty often...and just start a new pack. I haven't had a period in about 3-4 months...I was wondering if it was dangerous.

Need tips on BJs

CollegeGrrl219 — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 14:58:54 GMT

I need some good tips on giving blow jobs. My jaw locks up after awhile. I seem to be just fine getting it started, but I can't finish the job, and I just give up half way through and either finish with a hand job or just climb on top of him.

Is there any trick to not getting tired? I'm afraid that if I just stick it out I'll accidentally bite or something tragic like that.

Speaking of 3somes

jpeazybreezy — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 23:01:59 GMT

SO, that other post about 3somes got me thinking. I have always had this naughty fantasy (will never act on it, that's why it's called a fantasy, not a hope/wish/dream) where I was with 2 guys. Something about being the center of attention like that! Or a 4gy, 2 girls, 2 guys. Sounds like so much fun! By keeping it a fantasy there's no real world stuff to interfere with the unbridled pleasure I imagine would occur. LOL.

My question is, are there fantasies that you guys have, that while you would never do them, they still intrigue you?

Husband's insecurities

Lissak06 — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:09:23 GMT

My husband and I have been together for nearly a decade. This isn't new information that I am about to explain to you, but I am looking for some guidance.We dated nearly 6 years before getting married and have been married now for a few months. When we began dating sex life was as you can imagine, nearly every day or every other day. As our relationship grew the sex began to dwindle to once a week and now almost once every three weeks, sometimes once a month. I can't handle this for much longer...I am a very sexual person who could stand to go back to daily frisking. He knows this and is aware of my willingness to fornicate but does not seem to improve. I am writing this today, because recently a few things have occurred that I am not sure how to handle.

First, I found lots of porn on his iphone - which leads me to believe that he too likes sex and is easily aroused or rather does not lack testosterone by any means. However, still no sex for me. Should I approach him on this? He doesn't know I found the porn and I feel hurt that he's willing to masturbate over strange women, but won't have sex with me.

Second, He came out of the bedroom completely naked not realizing I was near by to see him and then panicked when he realized I saw full frontal. He didn't want me to see him naked at all and hurried to put on underwear.

I asked him why he was in such a hurry to cover up - because after all we've been dating for nearly a decade. He told me he was insecure and that I wouldn't understand. I am worried that this will always be the case and I will 1. never see my husband completely naked unless we're under the covers about to get it on and 2. our sex life may diminish entirely if he can't overcome this insecure feelings.

Is there anything I can do? Please help.

Swallowing

peppergrass@me.com — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:36:46 GMT

Do you spit or sallow? If you spit, why?

Vibrating Panties?

sarahaaron08 — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 23:42:32 GMT

Does anyone have any? We watched The Ugly Truth last night and DH is now wanting me to get a pair. WDYT? Any one have any?

How many of you are nervous?

LilMizTyler — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:08:20 GMT

About using a vibrator or masterbating in front of your SO. I guess I'm not self-confident enought to do it, although my hunny says he would love for me to do it in front of him. He doesn't have a problem doing it in front of me and I love to watch him do it. I just get too paranoid I guess. Any ideas?

PCO & lower sex drive

djs5050 — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 17:17:25 GMT

So, I have PCO (polycystic ovary syndrome) and my largest symptom of this is that I never get my period unless Im on birth control. Ive been on BC for the last 5 years, and about a year or two ago my sex drive kinda plummeted. Nothing during that time period really changed, I didnt switch BCPs or anything like that. I dont know why it happened.

I'd love to get off BC completely because I really think that's the reason for my lower sex drive (I hope), but I still need something that will treat my PCO so that I stay regular (Unfortunately, not getting my period IS actually a health risk).

Does anyone out there deal with this, and have you found anything that worked? I read a little about a progesterone pill called Provera but wanted to hear if anyone had an experience with it.

so I asked my dh about the

newbaby on the way — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 17:30:44 GMT

Brazilian wax. If i should get it done, If he wanted me too or if he doesnt care at all. He just said " I dont' think you could handle it" what is that suppose to mean? he just laughed afterwards . I mean does it really really hurt that much. :$

no experience

pazzorae — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 22:23:18 GMT

I've been married for a few months now. My husband and I were both virgins when we got married. We're very happy together, and we have fun making love, but we aren't very good. He's a very big man, and it actually hurts me very often to have sex. I feel pressure when he goes deep, and I can actually feel pain raidiate up to my lower abdomen. Is this normal? Also, he has his orgasm very quickly during penetration (like within 30 seconds). He actually is frustrated that we can't have one at the same time because he has one so fast. Any suggestions for how to fix that?

Husband with low sex drive

sarahtucker — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 21:46:58 GMT

My husband has a very low sex drive. Some background info: He's 25. We've been married for almost 9 months. We were virgins on our wedding night, so for the year we were dating he was super horny. I know that he masturbated, he's a dude and he told me. He use to get hard all the time when he was a young teenager. I think he was so horny all the time when we were dating because we weren't having sex, it was all about the chase.

Our honeymoon was amazing, sex like 3 times a day. For the first 3 months-ish we had sex at least 3 times a week, but I usually initiated it. Now we have sex about once a week and 3 out of 4 times I initiate. He's super affectionette, always hugging, holding, kissing, playful grabbing, . saying sweet things, that sort of thing.

We talked about it and he said these are the reasons he thinks his sex drive is low 1)I'm always willing, he knows he can get it whenever he wants 2)It's a lot of work for him because I can't get off through intercourse, only oral, so it's not as fun for him (I could for like the 1st month of sex but now I can't) 3) he doesn't get horny like he use to, and he doesn't know why 4) we've gotten very routine with our sex...routine, haha. He's very concerned about this because he knows that I am a very sexual person and he wants to make me happy.

Any advice for us? Maybe ways to spice it up? Ways I can get off through intercourse? Maybe he has an underlying health issue? TIA!

the porn issue again...please help me before I make a stupid mistake

anniephd — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 15:09:05 GMT

So...I was reading about the post a few days back about H and porn. I feel like I could have wrote that post.

All you seem to be great support and I think I need some help and advice.

A little background; me and my H dated about 1.5 years before we got married. H had been in a sexual relationship before and wanted that with us but he respected my decision that I'd like to wait untill we get married. He was not quite sure he was ok with that (not having a sexual relationship) so he took some time off when needed some space and eventually we got back together and finally got married.

Ironically in our marriage, I have the higher sex drive and it has caused many arguements and tears. I have spoken to him so many times and he understands my needs however he admitted he used to have a higher drive but kind of faded away through our non sexual relationship. On top of that he said his demanding job (he comes home 10pm on average), our financial problems and his focus on going back to school tires him out. Over a bit of time (like 6 months) we learned to communicate about sex and don't argue that much about it any more. I gradually tried to admit that with my H's long hours and stress this is the best he can do. He also promised he'd try hard to meet my needs as well.

BUT!!!! recently when we were watching movies on his computer together he's get these weird pop-ups from porn sites. He looked very embarassed and just closed it comaplaining he doesnt know where they come from. It happened again a few times. I never suspected or accused him of anything. THEN yesterday I was cleaning the house and saw he left open a porn webpage with his login info promt. I did a VERY shameful thing and snooped and I was shcoked to see he has some porn sites bookmarked (I know I shouldn't have snooped).

I feel very hurt. I want to know why he was lying, why does he need porn when he says I have such a high sex driive he said he can't keep up with? I'm worried he needs porn just to be able to have sex with me (like maybe he lost his attraction to me and needs stimulation). I'm worried he has sexual desire but can't be fulfilled by me (even though I want sex almost all the time). I'm also worried if I over react it's going to get ugly.

I have to admit that I watch porn...I started watching porn when my H can't have sex with me and i told him that. I was trying to take some pressure off him. But I ended up not liking it really porn and stopped. I'm worried he's going to make that an excuse and backfire me.

I'm so freaking out here...ladies help...should I just relax and let it be? Since it's bothering me so much should I confront? How can I talk to him about this? Please help me before I do something very stupid!

do you discuss past sexual experiences with DH?

Shayna ATL — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 03:12:58 GMT

I'm not just talking about sharing your number with DH. But do you ever talk about things you've done or tried with other guys? For example, if DH wanted to try a new position and asked if you've done it before, would you tell him if you have? Would you tell him how you liked it, who the guy was, etc? Or are you more apt just to keep past details to yourself?

Female Ejaculation

AChambers18 — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 02:32:36 GMT

Not able to do it. Never seen it in person. Seen it online.

Does it exist?

Has anyone had personal experience?

only w G orgasms or C as well? is it every time or just once in a while

A bit embarrassing.....

rachelandjon09 — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 01:20:11 GMT

My DH and I were both virgins when we got married, and have really been enjoying our recently developed sex life. Recently, we have begun to pursue conception, as we both REALLY want to have a child! However, we have had a bit of trouble in the sex department recently.

When I was giving my husband a BJ during a recent lovemaking session, instead of ejaculating, he urinated! It was rather disgusting, but we thought that it might be a one-time deal. However, he has done it several times since then.....and has not ejaculated more than a few drops. Does anyone know what is going on?? We are slightly concerned.....

~Rachel

B pics for H for Christmas

mrs.forrister — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 18:46:39 GMT

I had B pics made for H this past Sunday. I had a great time!! It was so much fun and I was so comfortable. Anyway, I am going to make a photo book of the images instead of just putting them in a photo album. I need suggestions on what to call the book. I was thinking about "Bedroom Secrets" or "Bedroom Stories". But I don't know if I really like either one of those. Any ideas/suggestions?

Could use a little help!

ladycee — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 09:58:50 GMT

My FI and I are having a little bit of difficulty lately trying to figure out some new positions due to the rather large height difference. He is 6'6" and I am 5'2". Sure we've done most in the bed lying down or behind, etc... We want to try some other things as well though. Any good positions anyone can recommend or can anyone relate to this situation?? Open to almost anything here as we are really much of a shy couple! TIA

Does your guy....

anmmbm — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 21:20:47 GMT

groom "down there"??

raynes

alovelylady — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 15:01:35 GMT

I am confused about you saying that I am strange....???? Am I strange because I post things that are going on in my sex life, just like every one else on here?

Pet Names

maggiemay07 — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 03:27:23 GMT

What are your favorite pet names for your husband and his member?

frenchie tips.....(not nails)

alovelylady — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 16:32:39 GMT

I hate frech kissing, the thought of spit totally grosses me out! How you stomach french kissing your DH? Anhy tips?