I, too, have been married less then 6 months. We were both independent singles prior to marrying and it is the second marriage for both of us. Older and wiser does apply! Yet, we still had our petty arguments about unmet, unstated expectations.
What worked was when I stopped being critical and started talking about dividing the chores in terms of our individual strengths, rather than in terms of traditional sex roles. People generally enjoy doing what they like and feel they are good at, don't they? We both agreed that we can fashion our marriage to suit ourselves.
I don't feel embarrassed to say that I am the motivator, the idea person, the planner. My husband is more laid back, a helper personality, and he enjoys being Tanto to My Long Ranger! I had to realize that I made the right choice of temperment for my personality and stop trying to make my husband be more like me.....even if, as women in our culture, we are raised to look for a leader-type personality in a man. We need to ask ourselves, as women, what happens when too leader-type personalities get together? Conflict, that is what happens.
By the way, I had to change after I got married, too! Less autonomy and privacy, for example. My adult married son told me that getting married is just trading one set of problems for another. I thought that was very ADULT of him!