Oh and BS on not being able to pay for a wedding. It cost like 35.00 at the Justice of the Peace. Having a child sometimes means we don't get the pretty princess day we dreamed of. You could always look at it as, when you get your house it took the place of a wedding.
i refuse to give up on my dreams of having a big beautiful wedding. It's really important to me. I'm just fighting myself because what I want and what I know is reality are two different things.
I'm sorry, but I think the ship has sailed on the big beautiful wedding. You and your FI have been together for 7 years and haven't had one yet despite being engaged for 2 years. If it was that important to the both of you, you would have done it already, so I think its time to either quit dreaming about the beautiful wedding or just get it over with a very very small wedding.
What happened with the babysitter/ daycare? Were they not very good because you were trying to go cheap and did not go to someone reputable? My daycare is very good, but they are expensive. If it is cheaper for you to stay home then to work, then by all means stay home.
Can't you take classes in evenings when your FI is home? Also I would speak to your doctor about possible PPD and/ or counseling. I get being sad that you can't afford having another baby or have the room for one, but there also seems to be a little disconnect from reality and you need a plan to get what you want instead of list excuses.
To previous poster, I didn't see any reference to OP being on government assistance, so I don't get your reference to her using your tax dollars.